26 And after my skin has been destroyed,This verse says something about the loss that we experience in our lives, whether it comes from a breakup, loss of job, death of a loved one, or simply the loss of the familiar. It is in those moments, the moments of loss and grief, that our soul needs to turn to something to sustain it. Not just to fix the loss, but to experience God in the middle of the loss. I've learned a lot from Listening for the Soul by Jean Stairs on this process of death and resurrection. She speaks on how we try to react to our and others' grief with a cold, problem solving approach. Here, in Job 19, I feel like Job hits on something that Jean Stairs is also getting at: the need to simply sit in the presence of God during loss rather than move past the loss as quickly as possible or figure out why God let this loss happen. Job doesn't mention anything about the recreation of his flesh. We know that he must have new flesh since he has eyes to see God with, but that is not what he holds in view. He looks at the hope he has in God despite the loss that envelopes him. Don't try too hard to solve yourself; sometimes the best remedy for hard times is to sit in God's presence and let him cover you. That's the thickness behind Psalm 46:10:
yet in my flesh I will see God;
27 I myself will see him
with my own eyes—I, and not another.
How my heart yearns within me!
10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;These moments of stillness are healing for the soul and they put things in right perspective again: not that your loss doesn't matter, but that God is with you in the depths of it. It's not that your problem doesn't need to be solved, but that there are deeper and more important things than solving your problems. I learned from Jean Stairs that these times of stillness with God are enriched by the presence of other people as well. These people can sit with you in silence as well or can sit there silently as you open your heart to them. We see Job's friends take this correct and wise position when they first come to soothe him in his grief in Job 2:11-13:
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
11 When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. 12 When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. 13 Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.You will remember Job's friends only started to fail when they tried to fix Job and force him to come to a resolution. While it is important to help people to move on from their despair, the way to do it is not to force them out of it with happiness or coming up with whatever advice first comes to mind. We see the foolhardiness of these approaches in Proverbs 25:20:
20 Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day,and Proverbs 18:2:
or like vinegar poured on a wound,
is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.
2 Fools find no pleasure in understandingHow do we help the person in trouble (or ourselves, if we are the one suffering) in these times of darkness? Like I said, being present and listening is most of what is necessary. While there are extreme mistakes that can demand correction, for the most part, what is needed is someone with whom to walk the dark journey of loss. Listen to the person as they try to figure out what's going on and ask them questions about what they're feeling. Even though Job said a lot of mean things about God throughout the book, he was found to have spoken better of God than his friends did, even though they worked hard to defend God and fix Job.
but delight in airing their own opinions.
Peace of Christ to you,
Simeon Snow
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